11 ɂ open spam

[mattersverymuch]

[It's been so many years since the marquis was young that he'd almost forgotten what it was like. He had been so small, ill-fed and underweight, and so easily broken. Which, really, explains a lot about what he's become - none of which he particularly wanted explained to the Barge as a whole.]

[To distract himself somewhat from this unfortunate reality, he has begun work on a compendium of stories, as he has nothing else to do with his time. Much of his work is done in the library, but much is also done in the CES, which becomes, variously, an abandoned city in a mishmash of styles, a thick, temperate, and foggy hardwood forest, and a riverside. He works mostly from memory and attempts comprehensiveness, though his writings as late veer toward tales of the trickster.]

Comments

[mattersverymuch]

Don't you? What do you think, then?

[deadly_ned]

I think that you come from a harder world than I ever had to and you did what you needed to do to survive.

[mattersverymuch]

. . . I did what I needed to do to survive.

Yes, that's accurate.

This place won't cure me of that.

[deadly_ned]

No. And it shouldn't.

I don't know why you're here.

[mattersverymuch]

Because by doing what I needed to do to survive, I destroyed a lot of people. But mostly, I think, because I don't regret it.

[deadly_ned]

Maybe it's not anything you did...wrong.

I mean.

You can point to some event or another in your life where you destroyed someone else. But you did it to survive.

So I don't think...you're a bad person who needs to learn how to be good.


I think you're a person who could benefit from having kindness done to him after a lifetime of being without it.

Maybe the Barge isn't meant to punish you. Maybe it brought you here so it could give something back.

[mattersverymuch]

I could give you a list of people who'd disagree.

[deadly_ned]

They don't factor into this equation. You do.

[mattersverymuch]

You have a very strange perspective on things sometimes.

[deadly_ned]

I just want you to be happy. Happy and alive.

[mattersverymuch]

So much that other people don't factor into the equation.

[deadly_ned]

I've never met the other people. I only go by what you tell me. And you don't always tell the truth.

[mattersverymuch]

You're biased because you like me.

[deadly_ned]

I know. It's a bad habit.

[mattersverymuch]

It's a very human one. So yes, it's a bad habit.

[deadly_ned]

You like that I like you.

[mattersverymuch]

Not particularly.

[Lies.]

[deadly_ned]

Yes you do. You like that you hold that sway. It gives you a warm, fuzzy feeling all over.

[mattersverymuch]

Well, I'd like it better if I'd actually tried for it.

[deadly_ned]

Do you not value our friendship because you didn't need to do anything for it except be yourself?

...

That sentence made a little more sense in my head.

[mattersverymuch]

I suppose there are worse ways to put it.

[deadly_ned]

Friends should like you for who you are.

[mattersverymuch]

Absolutely. But friends aren't much good in the long run, as I believe I've mentioned.

[deadly_ned]

I know.

I'm happy to be your friend in the short run.